Some Easy Ways to Become More Agreeable
1.Don’t Appear Distracted
When you’re out in the world, it’s easy to hide behind a comforting item. Some of these items, however, actively undermine your social interactions by giving off the impression that you don’t want to be bothered.
That’s why a lot of people wear Apple AirPods; by the same token, if you’re always tapping on your phone’s screen, people will assume that you’re busy.
So, if you want to become more approachable, you’re going to have to give up (or at least seriously limit how much you use) your devices.
Interestingly, an action as simple as wearing a pair of sunglasses indoors can also make you seem unapproachable. I used to wear Ray-Bans inside (usually because I forgot to take them off!), and I noticed that, when I removed them, people were likelier to smile at me, if not initiate a conversation. Hats and coats, too, can make you seem less friendly; taking them off once you’re indoors a nonverbal indication that you intend to stay.
2.Try Wearing Brighter Colors
We often only think of the color of our clothes when we’re trying to match an outfit, but we don’t usually take into account the ways in which certain colors affect how others perceive us.
If you want to be more inviting, ditch your black and gray clothes, which can make you appear more reserved, and try brighter hues, like reds and blues, that have been scientifically proven to positively impact mood.
I’ve found that eye-catching outfits tend to start conversations, which is why yellow, the color most closely associated with happiness, is my go to choice.
So, try more comforting, inviting colors, but don’t go overboard! Nobody likes a blaring neon shirt that draws too much attention to itself.
3.Don’t Look So Ill-Tempered
The manner in which we carry ourselves affects how approachable we are to others. People will be more inclined to avoid you, for example, if you’re always looking down, because you’re giving off the impression that you’re unhappy or irritable.
For most of my adult life, I’ve struggled with an angry-looking face, which has been frustrating, because I’m actually quite a happy person.
Well, I should say that I used to have this problem; I decided to matter into my own hands and tried Botox, hoping it would get rid of wrinkles that may be making me look upset, and it actually worked!
Bye-bye resting bitch face and hello new friends!
Thankfully, getting Botox was super easy; the consultation was quick, and my appointment took place the following week. Because the procedure only takes half an hour, I was able to visit my doctor’s office on my lunch break and walked out looking and feeling completely refreshed!
4.Express a Genuine Interest in Others
You should never force a smile, but it does help to take a genuine interest in what people around you have to say.
Two near-guaranteed ways to immerse yourself in any social situation are to surround yourself with like-minded individuals and avoid people whose personalities clash with yours.
If you do find yourself locked in conversation with someone you struggle to relate to, search for aspects of the person that you admire, and do your best to center the conversation around those particular traits.
Nod your head, too, to support what the person is saying; this will communicate that you’re paying attention. After all, it’s no secret that the more important you feel in a conversation, the easier it is to like the person you’re speaking to!
Meeting strangers can be a challenge, and it can be an even greater task to stay interested in someone for long periods of time, especially if you don’t have many commonalities.
I’ve frequently been in this situation, but always remind myself of two things: first, that I want others to listen to what I have to say, and second, that I should treat others how I wish to be treated.
This is what is known as “The Golden Rule,” and personally speaking, it has been a surefire way to win friends.
In one way or another, humans crave attention and seek the approval of others—it’s nothing to be ashamed of. I guarantee that, if you take heed of just a few of these tips, people will be scrambling to interact with you; the key is, simply put, to show that you truly care!