Is it okay for men to cry is a loaded question. In this post, we look at why is it an issue for some people and when it’s okay for men to cry.
For decades, women have been ‘bawling their eyes out’ everywhere without having to worry about what people might say.
Think about all the times you have witness girls crying over sappy romantic films in movie theaters. Or all the girls you see sobbing at wedding ceremonies. It is normal, and most times, even expected.
Men, on the other hand, have a harder time. Even in some situations where it is ‘okay’ for them to shed a few tears men will always try their best not to do so. Why? The answer is simple: stereotypes.
Is It OK For Men To Cry
Crying Through The Ages
Yes, men have always cried — after all, they are humans! Yet the acceptability of men crying has shifted across time and across cultures.
Meaning that, for as long as we can remember, society has made it its job to prevent men from crying in public. Especially in cultures where the man is seen as the ‘bread winner.’
The Silent Rule: Tough Men
Tough, manly, successful men do not cry. It is like a silent rule or commandment that every male abides. Nonetheless, as time passes, it has become more acceptable for men to cry in public.
New Breed Of Men
One could even say that the 2000s have developed a new breed of manly yet sensitive men.
This new kind of men are in touch with their feelings without having to give up their ‘alpha male’ status. According to recent studies, the average American man cries 2-3 times per month (soruce).
But, as expected, this conduct comes with a set of implicit conditions. In other words, it is okay for men to cry in public but only in certain situations.
And while this does not mean you should live by these rules… the world is not ready to see you sobbing uncontrollably.
When Is It Okay for Men To Cry
Hence, it is safe to say that in the following situations, it is totally acceptable and ‘okay’ for men to cry:
It Is Okay For Men To Cry When In Pain
Crying when you are in pain comes as a ‘no brainer.’ It has been scientifically proven that crying when you are hurt or in extreme pain is entirely natural.
It is called ‘lacrimation,’ which is the non-emotional shedding of tears. As a result, it has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with a person’s bodily functions.
It Is Okay For Men To Cry At Heartfelt Events
In other words, if you are a guy who cries the first time you hold your newborn baby, that is entirely acceptable.
The same goes for crying at your wedding, your child’s graduation, or when receiving an important award/recognition.
As long as you only do it at significant life events, it is definitely okay for you to shed happy tears.
It Is Okay For Men To Cry At Funerals
According to recent studies, 70% of men cry at funerals. Hence, it is entirely normal for men to express their feelings by crying at a funeral. Besides, it would be inhumane to tell you otherwise.
After all, few things hurt more than losing those you love, and mourning helps in the healing process.
It Is Okay For Men To Cry After A Breakup
Much like with funerals, crying over a breakup is totally understandable. Nonetheless, keep in mind that this does not mean you should be bawling at the supermarket or at the gym.
Let a few tears out, take some shots, and then move on… there is plenty of other fish in the sea!
It Is Okay For Men To Cry When Mad
Frustration is one of the most genuine feelings a person can have. It is also one of the most uncontrollable human emotions. Some research even suggests that crying is a mechanism that humans have developed to soothe themselves.
Also, it is a great way to blow off steam, and it helps to cope with tough situations.
The above-mentioned scenarios are just a few situations where it is ‘okay’ for men to cry. Nonetheless, there are plenty of other moments where you could do so without looking weak.
When Is It Not ‘Okay’ For Men To Cry
That being said, it is not ‘okay’ for a man to cry at his daughter’s dance recital or when his favorite team loses a match.
In moments like these, you can get emotional or feel incredibly proud. But, for your own sake, hold back the tears!
Scenarios When It’s Okay To Cry
The same goes for the following scenarios:
- After losing a job or being fired.
- After losing ‘material’ things such as a car or a watch.
- During a fight with a friend, girlfriend, wife, etc.
- While watching a dramatic or romantic movie.
- While listening to songs with gloomy lyrics.
- When you are at work or at your place of business.
- When you are tired.
- When things do not go as expected.
- If there is a way of solving or fixing the problem at hand.
Health Benefits of Crying
But, if you truly feel like crying, consider all the health benefits it has. These include:
- Helping to alleviate pain
- Enhancing and improving mood
- Releasing toxins and reducing stress
- Aiding sleep and respiration
- Detoxifying the body
- Restoring emotional balance
There Are Moments When Its Okay
So, to answer the question: is it okay for men to cry? Let’s agree that there are moments where it is more acceptable for men to cry than others.
But, crying takes courage! Especially when done in public. Thus, do not let society dictate what you should or should not do.
You do not need to hide your emotions, and you should always acknowledge your feelings. In fact, men who can experience the depth of emotions can be attractive to women.
Thus, forget the stereotypes and feel whatever it is that you are feeling… even if it means crying.
There you go! A wide number of reasons, situations, and even excuses for you to let it all out and cry without having to feel less of a man. It may help when trying comfort someone who lost a pet or someone who has a sick family member.