My life is not a self improvement project
“…We leave our homeland, our property and our friends. We give up the familiar ground that supports our ego, admit the helplessness of ego to control its world and secure itself. We give up our clingings to superiority and self-preservation…It means giving up searching for a home, becoming a refugee, a lonely person who must depend on himself…Fundamentally, no one can help us. If we seek to relieve our loneliness, we will be distracted from the path. Instead, we must make a relationship with loneliness until it becomes aloneness.”
― Chögyam Trungpa,
Get over myself.
The simple truth of a Buddha nature, god consciousness, is the joy of living for all beings, not simply myself. As the Dalai Lama would say – there are an infinite more chances for happiness when living for other beings joy.
I must let go of myself and search for self perfection, I must simplify; I must sit with it and face the wall with total courage. Watch. Listen. Hear the theme? The endless noise? Hear that story I can’t stop telling about what I lack, what I am owed, what I need? Go ahead and write a love letter to myself. Be my own best friend. Make an investment in me.
Know that we are precious, infinitely beloved, and irreplaceable, and what I am, what this is, will dissolve like a sand castle, my spine will collapse like a tower of pebbles, grain by grain and what a relief it is to know.
Yes. When I let go am able to see that everything will be alright. You are already alright. You are completely well.
“AS LONG AS we follow a spiritual approach promising salvation, miracles, liberation, then we are bound by the “golden chain of spirituality.” Such a chain might be beautiful to wear, with its inlaid jewels and intricate carvings, but nevertheless, it imprisons us. People think they can wear the golden chain for decoration without being imprisoned by it, but they are deceiving themselves. As long as one’s approach to spirituality is based upon enriching ego, then it is spiritual materialism, a suicidal process rather than a creative one. All the promises we have heard are pure seduction. We expect the teachings to solve all our problems; we expect to be provided with magical means to deal with our depressions, our aggressions, our sexual hangups. But to our surprise we begin to realize that this is not going to happen. It is very disappointing to realize that we must work on ourselves and our suffering rather than depend upon a savior or the magical power of yogic techniques. It is disappointing to realize that we have to give up our expectations rather than build on the basis of our preconceptions. We must allow ourselves to be disappointed, which means the surrendering of me-ness, my achievement. We would like to watch ourselves attain enlightenment, watch our disciples celebrating, worshiping, throwing flowers at us, with miracles and earthquakes occurring and gods and angels singing and so forth. This never happens. The attainment of enlightenment from ego’s point of view is extreme death, the death of self, the death of me and mine, the death of the watcher. It is the ultimate and final disappointment. Treading the spiritual path is painful. It is a constant unmasking, peeling off of layer after layer of masks. It involves insult after insult.”
― Chögyam Trungpa,