These are some of the most common ways in which we beat ourselves up and hold ourselves down. At most times, people in high stress can and do fall into one or more of these categories. Is it always true? Maybe… Mainly I use it as a reference point for myself. How am I treating and loving myself.
- ALL OR NOTHING THINKING: You look at things in absolute, black and white categories.
- OVERGENERALISATION: You view a negative event as a never-ending pattern of defeat.
- MENTAL FILTER: You dwell on the negatives and ignore the positives.
DISCOUNTING THE POSITIVES: You insist that your accomplishments or positive qualities don’t count.
- JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS: You conclude things are bad without any definitive evidence.
(a) Mind Reading: You assume that people are reacting negatively to you.
(b) Fortune Telling: You predict things will turn out badly.
- MAGNIFICATION OR MINIMISATION: You blow things way out of proportion or you shrink their importance.
- EMOTIONAL REASONING: You reason from how you feel, I feel like an idiot, so I must be one.
- SHOULD STATEMENTS: You criticize yourself or other people with should, shouldn’t, must, ought and have-to. Replace with could.
- LABELLING: Instead of saying, I made a mistake, you tell yourself, I’m a jerk, or a loser.
- BLAME: You blame yourself for something you weren’t entirely responsible for, or you blame other people and overlook ways that you contributed to a problem.
From Breaking the Patterns of Depression
by Michael D Yapko, PhD
Peace and Blessings